The first two months of 2010 has just ended which means three things to me...

1) The end of Year 1 / The start of Year 2 is approaching soon

2) Nationals is in like 20 days time

3) I'm turning 18

I have to say that having gone through AY09/10, I have definitely noticed a huge change in myself. Well I'm not sure whether its good or not, but all i know is i am no longer the Kai that used to be some time ago. In fact i dun even want to be known as kHai...

moving on

with the start of my new education level, i wanted to try something new and that was why i had joined Temasek Polytechnic Cheerleading team... Blazers... well we have been through loads.. there has been ups and downs... but recently i have had a whole load of downs. not being able to fly properly and also lost touch of my back tuck. well now i know how that P feels when we call him that.

I really got to put my mind into this. I cant afford to disappoint K and Coach A now. we are just 20 freaking days away. I starting to get my engine to warm up, but its not fast enough. Trainings gonna be everyday from now on.. that means i must really sleep early...

OK shall post my birthday wish list tmr i think...

Maybe I should not have said that 2010 is starting to kick off great in my previous post... I admit it hasn't been... Ok maybe I have high hopes on myself like how much I want to be in committee next year. I just realized that that might not come true due to my own attitude and such.

After I talked to J senior last Tuesday, I did a really deep reflection. I guess it’s true what my friends had said about me changing, emotionally, character, practically everything. I am no longer that someone who used to be thinking about how others feel. I no longer think before I do anything. It really sucks to know that you have change, not for the better, but for the worst. So I told myself that I would change. Someone who does not show his true feelings to the world; a facade that I have yet to build.

So I thought that after that night I have already set my resolutions straight and that I have already decided to be strong. It turns out to be that I expected too much out of myself. I was super disappointed when you guys just.....

This early morning rain really made me decide that this shall be the last. I am really going to put a stronger front. I am going to stand strong on my decision.

A butterfly after a cocoon; a rainbow after a storm; spring after winter; everything has a new form...

Time really flew past last year.

Frankly, I did not felt the festive excitement of counting down like how i used to just few years back. Maybe its due to the fact that my academic year starts only in April (this assumption was supported by my secondary school cliques).

What made me decided to blog today was that I felt like i abandoned this place for far too long and since its a new year, I decided to have a new start.

If it wasn't for the non-festive season feel, i would have said that it was a good start to 2010. Nevertheless it has started to kick off great. Training has been great ever since coach came back from her vacation. It's really nice to be able to show her how much i have trained but then again i did not improve that much i guess.

Oh wells time to go off... going for a run... cya