My Longest Relationship - the beginning

So today I wanna write about my longest relationship. No, I'm not here to brag about how long it is or to create a sad story about the break up. I guess I just needed to pen it down to have a proper closure and to create a written memory out of it.

First up, I wanna say how blessed I am to have had the beautiful opportunity to have this wonderful individual come into my life and actually be there for me through the tough and dark times, as well as celebrating the good ones. I admit, I am not easy to be with and I really appreciate that he actually stayed on and endured my craziness and insecurities.

Samuel and I first knew each other through Fridae. When exactly did our path cross? I really don't recall but it is somewhere between 2 to 3 years prior to actually being together. Yes, I had a crush on him, just through his profile, the spectacles, hair and somewhat bad boy look that attracted me. Unfortunately for both of us, at that point in time we were both in our own separate relationship.

Came end of 2009, the year that I got enrolled into Temasek Polytechnic was when Samuel and I started to reconnect with each other once again. Being young I was a mess. how we reconnected was due to my break up from the previous ex. No, I didn't use Sam as a rebound. Mr ex was already out of my life for 6 months before that, just that at that very moment, he decided to make it official that we're no longer together. So being the mess that I was, suicidal, I hurt myself. Thankfully for me, Sam was online on MSN, yes that's how long ago it happened, and he accompanied me through the night and ensured that I was alright.

I didn't want to be alone days following that and so I suggested for us to meet few days later. We eventually met, at Central and had Long John Silver and we spent some quiet time alone up at Fort Canning Park. That was when I asked him if he was OK that we started getting to know each other and if we could eventually date and be together. Bear in mind, this is roughly somewhere in Dec / Jan. Fast forward once again to May 2010, by then we have been going out and chatting for about 3 months or so I have grown so comfortable with Sam.

That year, PinkDot was held on the month of May, so he asked if I wanted to attend that together with him. Not knowing what to expect I just said yes, just so that I can spend more time with him (this is something I later noticed about myself, I would just say yes to any suggestions, as long as I get to spend more time with the person I care about).

When the date grew closer, we started to have concrete plan for that weekend. Friday night, we were supposed to go club together with his final year group mates in poly and after which, head back to his place to sleep over and head to PinkDot together the next day.

Being the sweet boy that he is, he asked me if I was ready to take it to the next level and be his on the dance floor, now of course I didn't say yes the first 2 times he asked, I mean how to, I could barely even hear what he was saying over the deep bass and sound of the music.

That feeling, I somehow can still feel it especially now as I am typing this out, feeling loved and wanted, it made my energy increase (not in any sexual way you horrible readers). My vibrational energy was at its highest. Which is why I decided to pen this down. I feel that I need to remind myself that I am capable of feeling that, of having that highest vibrational energy.

Of course I did leave out some details, 1 it happened 10 years ago, and 2 I have to keep it clean. But yes, looking back the past 27 years of my existence here, I feel that this very story here is one where I felt the most love, an experience that I wanna hold dearly to and never ever want to forget. Yes, it might be a painful process to look back and go through the experience in my head again as I type it out. But it is a necessity for the healing process. No, I am not saying that I have not healed or have not moved on from it, heck its already been 2 years since the break up. But like I said it is just me penning down my thoughts and emotions, I want to remember exactly all of these stories, emotions, and thoughts.

I'm gonna end here for now, this post on itself has so much emotions that I need time to compose myself before I can continue.

P.s boo boo, Thank you for making my first PinkDot experience a wonderful one by creating a very special memory that I can hold on to forever, and its uniquely ours. Yes we are no longer together but every memory, every experience is worth creating and remembering!

So, it is now already 2019 and i feel i should maybe start coming back here to really pen down my thoughts, emotions, and reflection for the day, considering how I have started to do reflection and planning for the next day, so might as well just make use of this blog as well. After-all, this blog does have the memories of the past. 

So I realized that there is nothing about my relationship here on this blog. I guess back then I was really happy. So maybe I should have separate posts about all these.

Smell you guys later!